Christmas Around the World(not really)

 ♫ It's the most wonderful time of the year

It's the hap-happiest season of all--♫   

We are so sorry we can't finish the song for you because we forgot the rest of the lyrics. But let's not dwell on that, after all it is the most wonderful time of the year! Christmas was a few days ago but we can still feel the joy it brought! Let's see how potatoes from around the world spent their day! 

Gabriela; Half-potato; somewhere in Canada: 

Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas. (yes I realize it passed) 
Everyone celebrates Christmas differently and I'm no exception. This Christmas was pretty much like all my other Christmases. 

On the first day of Christmas (Christmas Eve) Gabriela had dinner with her household. If there are any Polish potatoes reading this they'll get it. On Christmas Eve I gathered with my family to have supper. There are 12 different foods on the table, you have to have a bit of each. (you get full really fast). After supper we went to church and opened presents. Yes I got to open all of them.

On the second day of Christmas (Christmas Day) Gabriela had dinner with family. I went over to my uncles house and had a dinner there with family. (there's so many of us) after dinner and dessert, we open presents. (woo more presents) After all this and some catching up with the family, we headed home.

On the third day of Christmas (Boxing Day) Gabriela had family friends come over for dinner. While everyone fights in stores for the best deals, I sat at home and chilled with some friends. The parents partied upstairs while we dominated the basement. Eventually the party animals left and I got time to sleep.

For the rest of the holiday, my plans are bonding with my sisters, hanging with friends and chilling outside like the crazy person I am. (i kinda went outside in shorts with some friends...dont judge) That's my Christmas!


Camille; Half-potato; a different somewhere in Canada:

Merry Christmas! 
This was probably my most uneventful Christmas yet but I don't really mind. On Christmas Eve I went to Church with my family. After, we ate a nice dinner. Later on, at around midnight, we opened our presents. I spent my Christmas with my loved ones and that is also how I plan on spending the rest of my holidays. 


A bunch of random potatoes; Potatoes; A bunch of random places:

There is a tradition that we full potatoes no matter where we are in the world have. It is giving each other something important that we just got on that year. This shows that we truly care about each other, that we care more about other potatoes than some material object. Other than this potatoes spend their Christmas differently. There are some that like to sing carols. Many have a huge lunch with their family and friends that involve special holiday food like cakes. Some like to put on  Christmas themed plays and some like to watch these plays. However the potato spends their day it is sure to be joyful because everyone is surrounded loving and caring potatoes. 


So now you all have an idea of how different potatoes celebrated the wonderful, wonderful day of Christmas! What about you? How did you spend the wonderful, wonderful day? 

Oh and once again... WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS! (shh...yes we know this is a late greeting) 

FREEDOM(just for a bit)

so for the next two weeks THERE'S NO SCHOOL

WE ARE ON CHRISTMAS VACATION

Many humans spend their break doing things like sledding, skating, playing the flute and going away to different countries. There are even some that go to different countries just to play the flute while sledding. Full potatoes are on vacation just like us. Potatoes spend their vacation in a slightly different way. Many start to prepare for Christmas since there wasn't much time earlier due to school and work. They start to decorate their house, buy presents, and plan everything that they are going to do on Christmas. There are also some potatoes that like to just lay around all day after such tiring months and this contributes to the whole "couch potato" thing. The school break is a great time to enjoy the weather. Potatoes do things like roll around in the snow to become a snowball. If there are a lot of them they come together to build a fort while others have a snowball fight. Sometimes they also like to build a snowman while they are in snowball mode. Potatoes also go sledding, only they use baskets or whatever else they find on the farm. The potato version of skating is sliding around the ice and this is very popular among the young potatoes. The farthest most potatoes go during their break is across the road, as travelling takes a very long time and relatives usually aren't far away. 

So yeah that's what's happening. How about you? Are you on Christmas vacation too? If so, tell us what you're doing! 

HOT HOT HOT

Have you ever wondered about whether or not it's considered cooking yourself if you're a potato that goes to a hot tub? Well we have. Plenty of times actually. Since we are half humans and can't really understand the effects of a hot tub on a potato we asked several potatoes about their experiences and why they did it. Here are some responses: 

"When I was a young potato I sneaked into a hot tub to show off to my friends that I can do something adults can. At first it was great and  I became some great leader that my friends followed. They even followed me to the hot tub. We all pretended that we were being cooked in a soup. That was a bad idea because a human saw us and thought that her son was being lazy and tried to cook us there instead of going through a long procedure in the kitchen. The human did not approve of this so she took us to the kitchen to cook us. That was when we realized that the hot tub must have been broken or it's only called a hot tub to initimidate many because it wasn't really hot especially when you compare it to the pot in the kitchen. We weren't even in the pot yet but we could already feel the heat. Luckily, the human was called for an emergency meeting so we were able to escape. We were young and reckless back then so we went back to the hot tub for a bit even though there was the danger of being captured again. As for the dangers the hot tub brings to our health, I don't think there are any since we look like healthy potatoes."

- Bop Botato 

"Going to a hot tub is the reason why Iook older than those my age. When I was younger I hated how I looked more like my baby sister than those my age so I went to a hot tub to mature a bit. It took a few hours but it worked and I loved it! I ended up looking a bit more mature than those my age and this made those potatoes who made fun of me envy me! However, now that I'm older, I regret it because I now wish I looked younger but unfortunately there's nothing that helps with that. I definitely suggest that you all think about this before going in a hot tub"

- P. Otato

"One time for Halloween I wanted to be the scariest potato out there so I decided that I would be a witch. I realized that I didn't look too scary since I didn't look old enough to be like those witches you see in movies. This made me go try out the hot tub a few blocks away so that I would get wrinkly. After many hours it worked! I finally looked scary enough or Halloween! I got a good laugh after scaring so many children. Unfortunately, the wrinkles do not wear off so I'm now known as the local witch that everyone avoids. Always think things through because you might just end up like me."

- Ms. Patatolatogous

So based on these responses we can conclude that a short period of time in a hot tub won't really affect potatoes but it is better to stay away from them because if you lose track of time you might just regret it. 

ALWAYS STAY SAFE WE LOVE YOU ALL!!!

Shakey plane and opening cabins

I'm pretty sure those things where you put your luggages on a plane are called cabins but if not, I am terribly sorry for calling it by the wrong name. 

Anyways... I believe that either the pilot was not a potato or the weather has some anger towards potatoes on my flight back. The plane was always shaking and so I was uneasy but the worst part of my flight was about after 5 hours after taking off. It was bad enough that it was dark and the plane was shaking but then suddenly some of the the cabins opened by themselves and one of those was the one right above me. It was like those potato horror movies where you just know that the tomato is just going to jump out at in the middle of the chaos. It frightened me quite a bit and it made me realize how much I hate planes and I plan on not going on one anytime soon. Maybe my dislike is just some potato thing because obviously potatoes weren't meant to be up that high from their home, the ground. 

Unfortunately, I did not meet any potatoes there so I cannot compare those potatoes to the ones I know or tell you about how amazing they are. However, I did meet a lot of relatives. None of them were potatoes. I believe they were all full humans. It was nice to see some of my cousins but I felt quite uncomfortable with older relatives that told me they haven't seen me since I was a baby or something along those lines because it seemed that they've known me forever while I saw them as complete strangers. I can conclude that humans are harder to socialize with than potatoes. 

P.S. If you haven't noticed by now, I, Camille, am back from the Philippines!!!

Tell me if you're a potato living in the Philippines and I missed you during my vacation? 

Email: cambrielapotato@gmail.com

Twitter: @cambrielapotato

cold Movember day

What's cookin' good lookin'? Hopefully potatoes. ;)

As November is coming to an end we decided that we should mention...
1) how bloody cold it is
2) it's almost Christmas (look out for the Christmas special)
3) Movember
4) how much we love you

Let's begin this shall we...

Because we live in Canada it is absolutely freezing here. We know for a fact it will be colder with the coming days. However it got cold fast! But we got snow so it's okay. If it's cold and there is snow it is more tolerable. The down side is that there is very little snow and it's cold. Oh well that's Canada for you.

Christmas is like a month away! We can't wait. We are super-duper excited! Potatoes celebrate Christmas too, doesn't matter where they are. Potatoes celebrate everything, even if they aren't a part of it. They just love to party. We plan on making a Christmas special for all of you lovely people out there. Be on the look out.

Movember. We think this might be just a Canadian thing, but we could be wrong. Have any of you ever heard of Movember? Yes? No? Well Movember is the month of November. But it's not just a month any more. It is a month to raise money for prostate cancer. This is to show awareness for the cancer. Men (and boys) are encouraged to grow a mustache and aren't allowed to shave until the end of the month. There is a huge campaign that goes with this. If you want to read more there will be a link at the bottom.

 Now you may be wondering why we would mention this on a blog all about potatoes. Well here's why. Have you seen photos of potatoes with mustaches? Yes? No? Well potatoes are aware of the things that happen in the human world. (They should be if they want to survive for a long time and want to make the most of life.) Anyways they also grow mustaches (they try anyways) to help raise awareness for mold research. They have many potatoes passing away due to mold and there is no cure. Potatoes have taken the human event and made it more suitable for themselves.

We love you all whether you are a potato, carrot, tomato, dog, cat, human, alien or anything in between. We see that there are page views and we strive to make entertaining blobs for you! WE LOVE YOU!!

Hopefully you are in a place that's warm if not, we HIGHLY suggest going under many blankets, with a cup of hot chocolate, tea or coffee and with a book, laptop or phone to keep you entertained.

Keep warm potatoes!! See you next week!!

Link for the Movember page:
http://ca.movember.com/about

omg 50

We're halfway there. OHHHHHHH livin' on a prayer! -song we do not own-

This is so exciting! We are at post number 50! However Camille has left me to post alone. -insert sad face here- I hope she's having fun and is safe while on her trip.

Currently in Potatland the potatoes are celebrating 50 blog posts and the coming of the winter season. This celebration of winter lasts a few weeks. Once the harvest season is over the potatoes begin their celebration. This marks another year of survival. It's important to celebrate this as potatoes understand how important life is and how short it is for some potatoes.

However in the human world it is the 50th anniversary of Doctor Who. I don't know much about Doctor Who (don't shoot me) but many people are excited about it.

There's also a show on potelevision called "Potatooooo." It is the adventures of a young potato who ventures the world to discover what it means to be a potato. However the potato has to complete this mission before they a)rot or b)get caught by humans. Each time the potato dies a new one comes on the show. It's almost like the Hunger Games -again we do not own this- where it's a fight to the death. This show is celebrating it's 50th too! So exciting!!

What are you celebrating? 50th or not, we are curious to hear what you are celebrating!
twitter - @cambrielapotato
email - cambrielapotato@gmail.com

We are eager to hear from you!

Yummy yummy

Happy potsa friesday!

Before we begin you are probably wondering what potsa is. Well its quiet simple. Potsa is the potato version on pasta. For potatoes it is made out of fertilizer. 

Potsa friesday just means we need to have potsa and fries as one of our meals. No our fries are not made from potatoes...thats cannibolism and is frowned upon here. Theres some potatoes that take the days religiously so they would on eat potsa and fries that day. 

Each day has its own food(s). 

Fersoupday (fertilizer soup sunday)

Mudday (mud food monday)

Tootsday (almost like tater tots but not)

Waternesday (lots of water)

Exerusday (day of exercising)

Posta friesday

Sausturday (all about sauses)

Each potato celebrates these days at least two weeks a month. Its the law to uphold this tradition for a minimum of two weeks a month. Some will go everyday some just the bare minimum. It all depends on the potato. 

Why is Potatbell so Delicious?

Have you ever been to a restaurant and never wanted to leave? Well if you have, then you can imagine how we felt a few days ago when we went to Potatbell. Potatbell is a famous restaurant that's ALWAYS busy. Potatoes from everywhere come to eat there, even famous potatoes go there! We were so lucky to have been able to eat there because all the potatoes wanting to eat there make it so hard to get a table to even reserve one! The restaurant was a lot fancier than we expected. There were chandeliers, super shiny floor, and the potatoes there were all dressed so elegantly! As for the food, they were scrumptious! We've heard great reviews but we thought that they were exaggerating and after eating there we realized that they weren't! The food served there were food that would be typically seen in a fast food place but 192838288283738288941 times better since they're gourmet. Some things served there are poburgers, pries (both were named after potatoes, they contain no potatoes whatsoever), soil smoothies, fertilizer fondue, and fertile sandwiches. We wanted to get the best out of going to Potatbell so we tried everything that we just listed. Please don't judge us for that, it was just too delicious. The prices of the food also aren't unreasonable so spending your money there is definitely worth it! If you have the time we 105% reccomend eating at Potatbell which is located at 105 Polate Road! 

*We are not paid endorsers of Potatbell, we just really love it. But, if Potatbell employees see this, we would like to let you know that we would love to endorse it, just email us or tweet us! 

Trick or Treat!

*cue the fog and the scary music*

So as you probably already know, Halloween was yesterday! That meant lots and lots of candies for many, including ourselves. Potatoes celebrate Halloween quite similarly to humans. A week or two before Halloween, potatoes get crazy and decorate the entire farm. They tend to have contests with those nearby to see who can create the spookiest place. The winner gets to have the title "Halloween King/Queen" for an entire year and others look up to them because they are seen as the most creative potato of the year. Halloween is one of the very few times of the year that all potatoes like to dress up on. Little potatoes always go full out when dressing up. Some like to dress as superheroes, celebrity potatoes, and even carrots! The little potatoes tend to go trick or treating starting at around 6 p.m.. Since potatoes do not eat candy, they trick or treat for fertilizer and lots of other items helpful towards potatoes. However, there are a few random potatoes who like to give out candy. If a potato receives this, he/she tends to keep it as a souvenir since they can't eat them but they are too pretty to throw away. Older potatoes tend to throw parties that involve a lot of scaring and soil fights. Some are really brave, though some refer to it as "reckless", and like to carve themselves. Potatoes have seen how beautiful some pumpkins look so they decided to do it too, potato-style. Many have said that it hurts a lot but it makes them look great so it's okay. Potato carving is a bit similar to humans getting tattoos. There are so many great things that you can do at Halloween which is why potatoes love it so much! 

What about you, our dear friend? How did you spend you Halloween? Tell us all about it by emailing us or tweeting us! 

Follow your heart... or the yellow brick road

Humans have many goals and dreams and so do potatoes. Compared to humans, potatoes have a really short lifespan but that does not mean that they do not have things they want to achieve. Potatoes are quite optimistic and like to dream big even though they could be captured and eaten at any moment. Young potatoes have many dreams that constantly change just like human children do. One minute they might want to become a potato doctor and the next they might want to become a clown. As potatoes get older, many realize that what they really want is their own family so that they can enjoy their short lives with lots of other potatoes. There are so many potatoes around the world because many potatoes fulfil this dream. While there are lots of potatos that have goals in life, there are a few who have absolutely no idea what they want. Some fellow potatoes have noticed this and felt bad so they made it their goal to help others create goals. These are the motivational speaker potatoes. They like to go from farm to farm and talk to potatoes young and old and help them realize their full potential and the opportunities that lay ahead. These potatoes help others see that they can do so much even though they are potatoes and do not last very long. We humans also have people who speak to motivate us to set goals and work hard for them. One that we recently got to listen to was a rapper and he was quite inspiring. He told us that we should never give up and do what our heart wants. But if you don't really know what your heart wants I suggest you follow the yellow brick road, after all it worked well for Dorothy. You never know what kinds of being you'll meet and the adventures you'll experience so take a chance!

So potatoes we would love to know about your goals! Just contact us so we get to know more about what potatoes want to accomplish! 

mischievous lil potatoes

     Like in the human world, there is good and bad within the world of potatoes. There is evil lurking within the grounds of the farms. You have to beware of the rebellious potatoes. These potatoes are usually the ones who have gotten the disease (blob about mold). Other veggies try to convince moldy potatoes they have a cure for their disease, but honestly they are just lying to get information about the potato race and to have spies inside their enemy base.
    It's a tricky thing really. This is why the potato race is in danger. We feel like there will be an attack on the potatoes and we won't be able to help them. It's very stressful.
     The potatoes do their best to avoid having spies, they are very pesky and can usually get caught easily due to their size and texture. Finding a veggie spy on potato grounds is nearly impossible! Potatoes are not perfect (since we are half it explains why we aren't perfect humans :P ahaha we joking) so it's difficult to find a spy. Potatoes vary in sizes, texture (lumpiness) and colour. Potatoes live a difficult life trying to keep all their plans secret.
   
      If you hear or see a spy within the potato boundaries quickly alert potato-guards. They are like the police so to speak. Ways to report:**
email: cambrielapotato@gmail.com
twitter: cambrielapotato
tumblr: cambrielapotato

Good Luck!

**rewards will be given to veggies who help report spies**

Turkey Day (Canada)

Happy turkey day! We know it is being celebrated in Canada today and soon in America. However, we don't know where else it is celebrated.

Just like the rest of our human friends we celebrate thanksgiving. We are half potatoes so we celebrate with potatoes as well.  The way potatoes celebrate thanksgiving is a little different. They make it a huge party. They are very thankful they got to live through the holiday. But it is also a time for grieving because of the loss of their family and friends. This is a difficult time for potatoes. Sometimes they are confused in whether they should party or grieve, so they make sure to do both. Potatoes honour the fallen ones. They share stories of the best memories they have with the potatoes that have just passed away. They also vow to protect the loved ones left behind by the fallen potatoes. Once they're done, they have a feast and they make sure that the favourite foods of the potatoes that are gone are there. Potatoes also play lots of games including everyone's favourite: sack racing.

This day reminds everyone that danger is very close by so they must always stay alert and they must not take things for granted because it is easy to lose everything. This is a very emotional day for potatoes and they must quickly compose themselves because just like humans, they too have school the next day.

Potatoes are concert addicts

We don't know if you've heard but, we potatoes absolutely love concerts! Potato concerts are really similar to human concerts. Potato concerts can be indoor or outdoor but it is usually outdoor since everyone loves the big space and fresh air. Some potatoes can get really crazy and try to attack others in order to meet their idol so the security guards are really important. The security guards tend to be large, hard potatoes since they are more physically capable. Some fans are less aggressive and admire their idols by throwing soil at them. This may seem a bit strange but keep in mind that potatoes live in soil so it is used as kind of like confetti. Sometimes potatoes get lucky and are able to meet the potato they came to watch the concert of. When this happens, the fans usually ask for an autograph on their skin. This is because it is permanent so they can keep it forever. It becomes kind of like a tattoo. But it does suck for those who realize after a while that they don't really care about the potato that signed them anymore. Most potatoes spend a lot on concerts and merchandise. A popular item sold at concerts are t-shirts, these t-shirts are usually kept as a display since potatoes aren't always dressed up. So you see, there are many similarities and some differences between potato and human concerts. Since we are half potato half humans we have experienced both and they are both great  but we hope to one day attend a concert with just half potato half humans! 

Tell us about the best concert you've ever attended? Just tweet or email us! 

Couch Potatoes Run

Hey! We don't know if you've heard but today at Blorge Potatah High School, our friend Klotato's school, had a fundraiser called Couch Potato Run. We also had a fundraiser at our school today called Head for the Cure. Our school's fundraiser is quite similar to Klotato's. In both our schools we were able to buyout of our last period class. We then listened to a speech about the fundraiser. The fundraiser for our school is for cancer research while at Klotato's school it is for mould research. After this, we walked around the field and then ate hotdogs. At Blorge Potatoh High, students had to run. This was to get potatoes active so that they will not be labeled as "couch potatoes" and there is a rumour going around that running helps prevent mould. These schools are ran by two different creatures but there are similar events because we have similarities. Moulds for potatoes is like cancer for humans. It greatly affects the lives of those diagnosed with it and we all dream of a day when it can be completely gone, which is why there are many events that raise money that goes towards the study of these. Head for the Cure was a pretty tiring event but it was still a fun experience and we love to help out others when we can! 

We'd love to hear about the fundraisers that happen in your school! Tell us all about it through twitter (cambrielapotato) or email (cambrielapotato@gmail.com)! 

#firstworldproblems

HASHTAG!!
Humans aren't the only ones who use hashtags. Potatoes do as well.
When potatoes noticed that on Tater (potato version of Twitter) humans had #firstworldproblems trending they decided to join in the fun and came up with some of their own. They came up with #firstpotatoproblems. Just a little different from the human one.

Here are some of the problems potatoes had come up with...


"I want to explore this new farm but my couch is too comfy #firstpotatoproblem"

"Tickets to watch the finals of the potato-sack race are sold out so I have to watch it on my Potalevison. #firstpotatoproblem"

"#firstpotatoproblem cant do anything extreme because humans might see me"

"#firstpotatoproblem cant go skinny dipping because I would be naked forever"

"#firstpotatoproblem want to have fries but that would be cannibalism"

"#firstpotatoproblem cant have a campfire because I would become a baked potato"

"want to have ketchup but i'd have to eat my husband/wife/kids/friends/boyorgirlfriend #firstpotatoproblem"

"#firstpotatoproblem mr.potato head is scary"

"#firstpotatoproblem I wanna run down the farm naked but I would be naked forever than"


As you can see potatoes have great problems. These were some of our favourites.
Comment which was your favourite below or if you can come up with any post them there too.

Friday Night Lights

     In high schools all around the world, something that is a common after school activity that gets lots of LOTS of school spirit is FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS! Our school and the surrounding schools have football on these nights. Potatoes on the other hand, have a full-out intensive game of.....POTATO-SACK RACING!!

    This game was inspired buy the legend of the potato sack race. To keep up with the legend and make sure it is never forgotten. At the beginning of the games we listen to the principal of McPotato High explain the legend and rules. The two teams of that night are introduced and the race begins. These races aren't the regular ones you have. We potatoes have a different version. 

     In our version we have to hop around the track once and high five our partner and than they go. Sounds normal right? Here's the twist. We are allowed to use sponges, paper planes, paper balls and nerf balls (in warmer weather we use water balloons). As the racers go around the track to get the crowd involved, ou can purchase mud balls to throw at the team you dont support that night. It's all fun and games and we make sure we play safe. No one likes bruised potatoes. 

     We are starting to form our team. We don't know if we will find enough potatoes to join our team. Maybe you'll see us. if not hopefully you start your own games.

Survived the first week

To celebrate the survival of our first week in prison..we mean school. We interviewed a potato! Here's the interview:

Q-how was your first day? 

A-Quite different...as we get older we get put into a mixed veggie school and have to attend with carrots, lettuce, etc (i couldnt remember any veggies). Its my first time in a mixed school because i was always with potatoes until my parents got too overprotective and homeschooled me. 

Q-so how do you like it there? which kind of learning environment do you prefer?

A-Well its been a week so i havent gotten the full experience yet. But its different and not too bad. I like it so far. 

Q-do you like your new classmates?

A-Yea they arent so bad as i was told. The carrots are hard to get along with but they arent that bad. The rest of the veggies are really nice too 

Q-what about your teachers?

They teach a lot differently than my potato teachers did and my parents. Its hard to adjust to the fact that i have 8 teachers a year. 

Q-what would you say is the best part about school? 

A-I really enjoy landscaping. I learn about how to make the ground above me look nice. But i also really enjoy cosmetology. With the lessons in that class i now have one of the best looking green hair in the whole garden. 

As you can see potatoes can go through roughly the same situations as some people do. They wont be so open about it and if they are they like to be anonymous (the potato interviewed will not be named). 

Hope everyone is surviving waking up early and not sleeping in. Good luck with the rest of school!

Back to Prison

Hey there potatoes! Hopefully the title didn't scare you because we aren't criminals who just got arrested. We are simply going back to the prison that many refers to as "school". Back to school for potatoes hopefully  mean that they through with their awkward stage in life (if you don't know what that awkward stage is just read back to the post "awkwaaard"). Potatoes will have to be on the lookout for farmers because, assuming that they are through the awkward stage, they are now beautiful and delicious looking potatoes. Elder potatoes must now teach the younger potatoes who are entering a new stage in life how to become an independent creature that can make wise decisions. The potatoes hate this because they feel that it is all repetitive but now they are spoken to with larger words. It is not until the potatoes are more mature that they realize how important the elders are because the elders are known to teach very meaningful lessons. As to what those lessons are, well... that's a secret between the two potatoes involved ;) Sadly, we do not get to experience the great teachings of the most intelligent potatoes out there because we go to a human school. This year we are given more freedom in the classes we take so hopefully it will feel less like a prison. We hope that we will learn important lessons even though our teachers do not have the slightest bit of potato in them. We'd love to know how school is like for you! Let us know through twitter (cambrielapotato) or email (cambrielapotato@gmail.com)!!

How we feel: 

*We do not take credit for these pictures

It was a sMASHing hit

I deeply apologize to be posting so late once again but you see, I needed to help out a friend of mine. My dear friend Pota Tohr was recently turned into mashed potato. He was playing a nice game of hide and seek with his cousins when suddenly a boy found him and decided to take him home with him. Unfortunately for Pota, his friends did not know that he needed saving until it was too late because they were, as you already know, playing hide and seek. The boy who took Pota was also playing with his cousins but their game was baseball. The boy apparently hit the baseball to the evil neighbour's yard so it will never be seen again, to the anger of the boy's cousins. So when the boy found Pota he saw a great opportunity to make it up to his cousins. It worked. One of the boy's cousins hit Pota Tohr so hard that Pota turned into mashed potato, which the young kids enjoyed very much. So Pota now needs to comforted because being mashed is very new to him. He would love to hear from you so if you have any words of advice just let us know via twitter (cambrielapotato) or email (cambrielapotato@gmail.com) and we'll make sure that Pota Tohr will be informed!

A Letter From Poland

Dear Potatoes,

I hope all is well where ever you may be. I'm still travelling around the country of Poland. I have left the country and came to the city.

During my stay in the city, I have discovered how city potatoes live. I met these lovely folks down in the market place. It wasn't a big market, it was a small one near my other grandma's house. I went down with my family down to the market to buy some food for dinner. As I was passing by one of the stands I met a few young potatoes. They seemed cool so I stopped to talk to them. I discovered that these potatoes work hard. They all come from farms so they live the same lives as country potatoes, only they get packed away and brought either to stores or to little markets. Since we met in the market I'll tell you about their lives. They get picked from the ground and put into these crates. Later these crates are packed into a van. The van travels to the location of the market and then set up. The crates are arranged so the potatoes look attractive to the human eye. After being set up, humans come in and purchase them based on how much they weigh. I purchased some potatoes with my family and we brought them over for dinner. Later that day we had them for dinner.

It was a different meeting compared to the country potatoes but none the less it was exciting. I really hope to meet a few more potatoes in Poland. They are all sweet and romantic. Hopefully I'll meet some of you out there too. Let me know where you are and I'll try to meet you. 

Throwing potatoes your way,

Gabriela

Email: cambrielapotato@gmail.com

Twitter: cambrielapotato (follow us)

The Legend of the Sack Race

Hi! Surely you've all participated in a sack race at one point in your lives right? I love that game but I love the story behind it even more! If you're not a potato like myself, then you've probably never heard of the story. It's one of my favourite potato legends so I'll share it with you! 

It goes like this...

In a farm far, far away during a time long, long ago, there lived the McPohtahtohs. The McPohtahtohs were a very well-known and loved wild potato family because even though they were upper class, they were very humble and they were always looking for ways to better the lives of other potatoes. One day, a group of farmers discovered how fine the McPohtahtohs are and so they decided to gather all of them into a sack to sell them. The other potato families could not bear to see this happen to the McPohtahtohs so they teamed up to help with the rescue of the McPohtahtohs. It wasn't hard to rescue them since the farmers were fast asleep during the whole operation. However the potatoes soon found out that little baby Timothy McPohtahtoh was missing. It did not take them long to find him because his remains were all over one of the farmer's face; it seems that he was taken as a snack! No potato could accept this. They wanted to make sure that this will never happen again. They wanted to make sure that the farmers will never come near them again. So, the potatoes worked together to put the farmers in the sacks so they will know how it feels to be in there. This woke the farmers up and scared them so they tried to escape the potatoes and instead of getting out of the sack first, they just hopped away while still on it. Unfortunately for them, there were other people driving by, who saw them and once these people got home they told others about how silly the farmers they saw looked and mocked them. This was the beginning of the classic sack race. As for the McPohtahtohs, they lived happily ever after. 

As you can see, potatoes suck at thinking of ways to get revenge. I guess it's because potatoes are naturally nice. Since we're half potatoes we are also naturally nice. We promise. So feel free to email us at cambrielapotato@gmail.com and follow us on twitter (cambrielapotato)!

Around the world

Hey hey potatoes! I'm not back yet but I managed to find some wifi. I noticed that Camille didn't post yet so I'll give you all an insight on the potato world from this side of the world. 

Currently I'm in Poland and had the chance to get to know a few potatoes. We met in the field not too far from my grandma's house. (Quite romantic) We then continued to get close as I pulled them out of the ground. After a few were rescued  from the clutches of the the wet dirt (rain isn't a good friend sometimes to potatoes..it gets dirt wet and it sticks to the potatoes) we went on romantic walk and then dinner. It was so beautiful. 

I'm currently trying to figure out the life of a potato in the city as the country potatoes were easy to find and very romantic. 

I'll try to post a picture or two as soon as I get back to my hometown. 

~~~~~~

Hey so we want to get to know some of our fans (if we have any). Get in contact with  us through twitter [cambrielapotato] or email [cambrielapotato@gmail.com].

We REALLY want to get to know you so get in contact with us!!

SORRY

Sorry there was no post last week and these potato related GIFs will be the only post for this week...I really must be going...I'll talk to you when I get back...Until then please do enjoy these wonderful GIFs! 

se

Knock, knock

"Who's there?" you may ask. The bad news is that it's not Potina Atato (if you are not familiar with her you should read our post from the past "OH MY POTATO!!!!!!!"). The good news is that it's your favourite potato blobbers!

So we're here to give you a nice ending to your day (if you're still awake or a nice start your day if you live on the other side of the world), here are  some potato jokes!

Q: How do you describe an angry potato?

A: Boiling Mad!

Q: Why wouldn't the reporter leave the mashed potatoes alone? 

A: He desperately wanted the scoop!

"I think" said the sweet potato, "therefore I yam"

Q: What do you get when you cross a potato with an elephant?

A: Mashed potato!

Yeah we know these aren't any better than the last jokes we told you. But you just can't help but love bad jokes right? Once again, we did not make up these jokes. Okay bye! 

"Super Potato" teaches no values nor useful life skills

Fairytales are just great aren't they? They just never get old! We potatoes also have a few of our own! Here's one about two young potatoes named Mildred and Fredricton:

Once upon a time in a far, far away land lived two potato siblings named Mildred and Fredricton. They were told by their mother to gather some fertilizer. Unfortunately, there was no fertilizer nearby. They were already in lots of trouble because of a shovel incident so they couldn't face their mother without fertilizer. So Mildred and Fredricton decided to go to another farm to collect some. On that farm they see something unusual...a barn...is made up of lots and lots of clothes for potatoes and the theme song to their favourite show on the potalevision is playing... Being so young, they did not know better than to go and visit a completely strange place without protection from potential danger. After playing dress-up and watching about five episodes of "Super Potato" an elderly male carrot walks in the barn with a large bag. The young potatoes were always told to stay away from carrots but this one seemed so fragile and helpless so they decide to help the carrot. The three chat for a little while and  Mildred and Fredricton are about to leave with a cart full of fertilizer given by the carrot but the door was shut tight! At that time, the old carrot revealed himself to be a young and powerful sorcerer who cooks potatoes and gives them to humans in exchange of the secret potion that helps him maintain his   youth and gives him his powers. Mildred and Fredricton were on the verge of breaking down but they had to stay strong and think...think...think...An idea came to them! On an episode of "Super Potato" it was shown that love was a weakness of carrots, so the two young potatoes risked it all by running towards the carrot and giving him a great big hug.  This did not work because everything on "Super Potato" is made up. It was a good thing that the mother of Mildred and Fredricton was told by a neighbour that they thought they saw the children there. The mother was very angry and dragged the kids back home, where they were grounded. The carrot sorcerer was too amazed by the fact that the mother potato showed no fear to realize that they escaped. Ever since that day, Mildred and Fredricton learned that they should not go to unknown places by themselves and that they should just do as their mother says.

We hope that you enjoyed this classic and we hope that you understand the moral of the story! 

Life Changing Answers

Okay, maybe that's exaggerated. It's just one answer. But it's a very special answer because it is the answer to the question from the very special Leo, a fan of our blob!! 

So his question was: Why did you decide to make a blog about potatoes? 

The answer to that is....*cue dramatic music* 

We really wanted to socialize with other people around the world and we thought that making a blog is a great way to do that. We wanted it to be different and the first thing that came to mind was potatoes. At first we were just joking about starting a blog about potatoes but then we thought about it and realized that it would be great since most don't really take in the worth of potatoes. So much potatoes are being used everyday and yet they are seen as nothing but lazy, ugly, and fattening vegetables. We, of course, know that this is not true and we have shared their benefits, uses, and what we think their value is, through our blobs. Potatoes contribute a great deal to many societies and we felt that we should raise awareness for this.

Thank you so much Leo for asking us a question, it means a lot! If any of you would also like to ask us questions feel free to do so via Blogger, Twitter(@cambrielapotato), or our email (cambrielapotato@gmail.com) We promise we don't bite :) 

ITS THE END

Did we scare you? No? Okay good. It's not the end of the blog, world or our lives. No it's just the end of school. We are so happy that we managed to be released from this prison they call school, that we posted earlier! 

Seeing as this post has to be related to potatoes somehow (by demand of King Poh-Tah-Toh) we are very pleased to announce that the world of potatoes are free from school today as they start to prepare for their awkward stages. Parents are advised to keep watch of their children and will receive time off work of their child shows early signs of development. 

That's all for the King's announcement. Now onto how potatoes spend their summer. They'll most likely be preparing for their awkward stages of development to start. We half potatoes on the other hand, get to party and hang out with humans and other beings all summer long. This is so exciting. 

We have a lot of plans to go through. Hopefully summer is long enough and we can go through all of them. 

Until next time! ENJOY YOUR FREEDOM FROM SCHOOL! aka prison

I love the guy who invented potalevisions

Hi! 

So as you may have heard, we were watching on the new potalevision. You may be wondering what a potalevision is, so if you are, then you should know that it is our version of a television. 

We have a friend who sells potalevisions and yesterday a new potalevision was delivered to the store so we decided to check it out. It was great! It had SOOOO MANY channels and when watching it seems like the characters are right there in front  of you (it's quite hard to describe it but don't think of a 3D t.v. because it's better than that) ! 

What I just said sounds bad doesn't it? Now it sounds like we're complete "couch potatoes". But, we're really not. Promise. We were just so amazed at its greatness that we had to spend the day watching on it. We don't spend most of our time doing this. Please don't criticize us or any other potato because everyone needs a lazy day once in a while. Don't judge others based on one happening. It's those judgements that causes hate; for example, many believe that potatoes are fat and useless because they are thought to be sitting in front of a potalevision nonstop. I don't even know anyone like that (and believe when I say that I know A LOT of potatoes)!!!

Anyway, I should be going. I need to find something to make money off of so that I can buy my dream potalevision! Bye!

watching movies on the new potalevision, be back soon

awkwaaaaard

Hey Hey!! Hope you didn't miss us too much. We are back and ready to party!! Summer time is coming and potatoes are getting ready for the heat. 
 
Around this time humans are ending school and writing/preparing for exams. We have to do that too since we are part human. However since we are also part potato we can't wait for the summer.  
 
For potatoes summer time is almost like puberty season. It is the time they grow quickly and keep moistured. It's an awkward time for them. Growing up is hard for a potato. This is all because as the potatoes get over their awkward stage they have a few weeks to live freely before being captured by the humans. It's a tough life. But they enjoy the time they have.

 

Some awkward phases that potatoes go through are: a change in size, a change in colour, and the growth of roots. A change in size is a very awkward thing to be going through because at one point they're too big to play games with little potatoes such as hide and seek and roll around in the dirt, but at the same time they're too small to do grown up potato things like working out and going on dates with tomatoes. A change in colour is also very awkward because they seem to look sick since they aren't as green as the younger potatoes or as white as the older potatoes. Lastly, the growth of their roots is very awkward because they don't look pure and innocent like the young potatoes nor do they look mighty like the older potatoes with the full grown roots. These awkward stages in a potatoes life makes potatoes very sad, especially when others make fun of them for it, but hey, at least in the end they'll look delicious...umm we mean...beautiful... 
 
Summer for us (Camille and Gabriela) is like humans. We do go through an awkward stage in our lives but earlier in our life. In the summer we tend to hang out with some friends or we live in our basements. It's a lot cooler there so we like to hang out there too. You see we aren't too much like potatoes. 
 
Until next friday! BYEEE!!!

OLAY!!

No we aren't talking about the shampoo. The word is just fun to say.
We discovered something. You ready to hear our greatest discovery? You sure? Well, how do we put this... WE CAN POST GIFS!! You don't understand how excited we are. Here's a dancing potato to brighten your day. He's quite fancy too.**

We would like to apologize for being so late. You see exams are coming up and we are getting quite busy. Don't worry, soon we will be posting on time. Anyway onto the actual post.

............................... Sorry we got entertained by the dancing potato. He's really good. (Better than us).

Let's make it a dance party in here. When potatoes party, they party HARD! They have colourful lights, loud music and so much food they almost explode. Of course no human or animal can hear this cause it all happens underground. The potatoes tend to be very secretive about their parties. However, we were lucky enough to get invited to one and get permission to talk about it a little bit. Okay here's how crazy the party was. Take this...



multiply by 9999999999999999999 and that's how crazy it was. It was pretty intense. Next time we will try to sneak some of you in.

Until next blob (this friday), ADIOS!!

HOOOOT POTATOOO

As you may or may not know, we potatoes enjoy getting fancied up, especially on special occasions like the birth of a potato or when we go on a date with a lovely tomato;) We make our own clothes from whatever we can find, such as leaves, cotton, and dandelions, so we really put effort into it so that we can look real good. Our clothing designs are all inspired by what humans wear because even though some can be cruel, they have a great sense in fashion.

Here are some of the hottest clothing of the season:

Potatoes are pretty amazing don't you think? They look good with or without these extra accessories! Do you agree?Do potatoes dress well or should potatoes hire another creature to make their clothing? Or should potatoes just forget about all this?

As a side note...from now on we will only be posting on Fridays. This is due to the fact we are drowning in projects and homework as the year is ending. That plus we usually forget to post. We are sorry you wont hear from us as often but hey, we arent going too far. 

Home is Where the War is

Watching T.V. and seeing all these vegetable commercials made me think of the history of our homeland and its struggles. The commercials made me realize that its not so bad being a half potato half human because I can choose where I want to live. I can choose live in a house without getting eaten and I can choose to live underground without scaring other potatoes. 

Potatoes get scared of outsiders very easily which is why they're very protective of their homes. This is because long ago the war between the potatoes and carrots started. There are many reasons for the war, one of the reasons being that both the potatoes and carrots wanted to have the biggest homes in the farm so they fought each other for it. In order to think of new ways to defeat each other they both thought of making plans underground. This just strengthened their hatred towards each other because they both thought that the other was copying their idea. No one really knows who thought of living underground first. No one wanted to live above ground again because they became so attached to their new homes since it gave them more privacy and they wouldn't get fried because they aren't under direct sunlight.  Until now, both potatoes and carrots live underground and refuse to leave. There is a great tension between them so I'm really glad that I live above ground because if not, the carrots might attack me since I look like a full human who is taking up a lot of the underground living space that could be theirs.

So as you can see, vegetable commercials really makes someone think about life. They made me think of potatoes which then made me think of farms which then made me think of the homes of potatoes, leading to me thinking about a bit of potato history. Wow! These commercials sure are powerful! 

Long live the potatoes! 

OH MY POTATO!!!!!!!

We're truly sorry if our title made us seem like extreme fanpotatoes...But I guess we are extreme fanpotatoes...Please don't change your views on us...Anyway, we both know you're also a secret extreme fan-insert your species type here-...

Okaaaay moving on... GUESS WHAT?? WE MET POTINA ATATO!!!!!!! Isn't that great?! You're probably filled with an overflowing amount of jealousy aren't you? Why wouldn't you be? We met a super rich and super famous potato! If you don't know her then you should know that Potina Atato is an opera singer. She's been singing for years, so most potatoes are familiar with her. She's also the role model of many young potatoes because she's a well balanced and generous potato- she has many concerts where all money collected is donated to charities for different creatures like cheese, tomatoes, and lettuces!

We really enjoyed meeting Potina Atato. She was really down to Earth.  She gave us some tips on opera singing and even let us tour her car! 

If you ever have the chance to meet her or have already met her, tell us about it! Also, if you want to know more about Ms. Atato, just ask us! We know lots of information about her (we know so much that we were quite afraid that when we met her we would come off as stalkers)! Meanwhile, we'll be out shopping for some Potina-inspired items (sorry we can't help it, we're just too big of a fan)!

Jokes on you

Yellow peeps! (ha ha see what we did there? No, okay that's cool.)

Today we have decided to make your day the best. Well actually we get guarantee that. Here's a few jokes about potatoes to brighten up your day.
Let's start with the most common one.

Q: Why did the potato cross the road
A: He saw a fork up ahead.


Now onto some other ones. 

Q: Why do potatoes make good detectives? 
A: Because they keep their eyes peeled. 

Q: What do you call a potato that is never motivated, but are content to watch others? 
A: "Speck Tators"! 

Q: What do you call a baby potato?
A: Small fry

Q: What do you say to an angry baked potato?
A: Anything to butter him up

"I yam, what I yam," said the sweet potato.

Q:A skin I have, more eyes than one. I can be very nice when I am done. What am I?
A: A potato

Three girls were on the run from the cops – a red head, a brunette, and a blonde. During the subsequent high speed chase the red head spotted a potato farm and suggested that the girls should hide out there.
Once at the farm all three girls girls climbed into a potato sack. The cops came to the potato farm, looked around, but saw no sign of the girls. The sheriff started kicking potato sacks to see if maybe they were hiding.
The sheriff kicked the bag with the red head in it and she yelped “Bark Bark” so they thought it was a dog. He kicked another sack, this one with the brunette in it, and she said “Meow Meow” so they thought it was a cat. Finally, just as the sheriff was about to give up – he kicked one last bag, with the blonde inside, and heard “POTATO!”

Two little potatoes are standing on the street corner. How can you tell which on is the prostitute?
A: The one with the sticker that says IDAHO

Okay those were bad. Sorry guys. But what can we do?
*We do not take any credit for coming up with these. We found them online.*









For those of you that are a little dirty minded, you might get this one. ;)
A guy and a girl potato chip walks into a nightclub. As they get a table the girl excuses herself to go to the restroom.
As the guy potato chip sits down and begins to order, another girl potato chip asks him…….
“Are you Herrs or are you Frito-Lay?”

Fun Potato Facts

It's May 8th so...May the fourth be with you times two. Here are eight potato fun facts:

1. For a very short period of time in Alaska, potatoes were more valuable than gold

2. The potato is the very first vegetable to be grown in space

3.  Potatoes were thought to have made childbirth easier

4. The world's largest potato was grown in the UK in 2010, weighing about the same as a newborn baby

5.  A potato is about 80% water and 20% solids

6. Long ago, Europeans did not accept potatoes because they claimed to not have been in the Bible

7. Potatoes have more Potassium than bananas

8. Potatoes have more Vitamin C than oranges

Once upon an adventure...

GREETINGS!
So as you probably don't know, we went on an adventure and oh did it ever turn out to be so much more than we expected!
So here's how it started:
Once upon an adventure we decided that it was a beautiful day to go outside and visit the nearest rural area with a potato farm so that we can keep up to date with our fellow potatoes- so I guess you can say that we didn't really plan on going on an adventure. As we were going up the road to the potato farm however, we spotted a very suspicious looking carrot! So of course, we followed him! It was very tiring following him because it meant following him underground (not that we minded it too much, we are potatoes after all), then through several lakes and ponds, and even on random people's rooftops! The worse thing about it though was when the carrot finally reached his destination and we found out that it was just the old factory which was just across the potato farm (wow carrots go through such troubles just to makes sure that they don't have any followers)! The old factory was known to have been closed down several  years ago because they ran out of milk to process. BUT, carrots are really secretly working inside that factory to make chips! Not just any chips! They were making strange and disgusting flavours of potato chips! This was the worst kind of torture! We of course needed to provide proof to send to the other potatoes and we got them but not without putting up a fight with the carrots. We almost got turned into potato-human chips (YUCK! Who would eat that???) so we shared with you one flavour that they made just in case we could not escape. Fortunately, we did escape so now we can tell the other so that it can be stopped! Make sure to tell us if you've encountered any weird potato chip flavours!

Here are some of the many bizarre flavours:

e.....vi......dence.....

We did post on Sunday, but on the wrong blob. Here it is :]

Jamming to potatoes

We still can't find a reason to why we keep missing our Wednesday posts. This is quiet upsetting, we feel as if we are letting you down. To make it up to you we have added a special "part" to this blob. You'll have to see what it is at the end, we won't say anything.

Alright, let's get this show on the road.

There are many shows that have a potato as their star. Well, they aren't the main star but they are in an episode or two. For example in the Wiggles (a very popular show when we were younger) made a whole song about potatoes. (They are quiet the singers might we add.) Anyways we shall provide the link below. You may have heard of this song. It's called Hot Potato. To be honest, I (not saying who) still know the dance and lyrics to this song to this day. Yeah, I was a big fan of the Wiggles.
Hot Potato

Continuing on. Another show they were on was some random one we found on YouTube. Anyways the video was called Small Potatoes - Imagination. We're not quiet sure what that was about but we decided to include it anyways. (We must say that the beginning was quiet catchy.) The link will also be below. Hopefully you enjoy that.
Small Potatoes

As you can see potatoes are huge in the music and tv industry. They make songs and appear in tv shows (and in blobs). Sadly not many people appreciate potatoes and their hard work. On the bright side, potatoes enjoy staring in shows and songs even if they aren't acknowledged. To them it's all fun and games (until someone gets eaten).



Hopefully we remember to post on the weekend. But to make it up to you for missing Wednesday, here's a bonus clip.
Minions









All bolded words/titles do not belong to us. Copyright of whoever runs them and created them. We just run a blob and used the videos (links) and names as references. Thank you, enjoy your day.

It's a love story

We are truly sorry for the delay but we were caught up in some... ummm ... *cough*romantic*cough* business. Like everyone potatoes also fall in love. Lucky for us we have found our true love, our soul mate, or whatever you humans call them. 

Our story begins like this.....

A couple hundred years ago a potato rolled up around the farmland. He came upon a garden. There he saw the most beautiful food he ever saw. A tomato. They instantly fell in love. However they weren't allowed to be together because the potato belonged to the vegetable colony and the tomato was part of the fruit kingdom. It was forbidden for the two to be in love or even know each other (kind of like Romeo and Juliet by Shakespeare). 

The potato kept meeting up with the tomato. Than one day when the potato went to visit the tomato he discovered that she was gone. Heartbroken, the potato went to the part of the vegetable colony that was to be harvested to commit suicide. 

A few days later at McDonalds a human came and ordered fries. The fries were the potato. He had undergone torture and surgery. He was going to end his life today. The human took his fries and went to another counter, there he covered his fries with ketchup. Now ketchup was the tomato that was forced into surgery and tortured for trying to rebel against the human and factory. 

Once squirted onto the fries, they rediscovered themselves and spent the last few seconds of their lives happily together. They only had until the human ate them. 

A carrot saw this happen and hated the potato for taking his love away from him. So he cursed the potato to forever only love the tomato. The potatoes are cursed to always fall in love with a tomato. 

                                         THE END.

Cloudy With A Chance of Poil

If you are here in Potatoworld please expect the rest of the week to be fairly cloudy and please prepare your under underground shelter because you can surely expect some poil (potato hail). We all know that when the weather has mood swings and is continually changing from a sunny morning to a stormy afternoon, many potatoes go insane. Potatoes going insane is a bad, bad thing (despite the fact that it's really funny) because potatoes sometimes get a weird urge to launch themselves up to outer space and they stay there for a few hours until they all come charging back down, causing a poil. This means that random potatoes will be attacked and injured, so we suggest that all you potatoes go to your under underground shelters for the rest of the week when the weather is still strange so that you will stay safe and so that you will not be needing a burial (which isn't like a human burial, just in case you other creatures who read this don't know) any time soon.We potatoes prefer consistent weather that is not out of pattern so any slight changes will cause poil, so we apologize because it is quite hard to control ourselves- the only way to kind of contain ourselves from causing poil is by going to under underground shelters so that we will not really be affected by the weather but since we don't have a way of finding out the future weather (unless we are one of the higher classed potatoes who can do things like check the internet like you are now or unless we were born gifted and are psychic) it is hard to prepare and avoid going insane.

Also expect cooler winds going at the speed of 40km/h and occasional flower petal showers.

...and that concludes our weather report! Stay tuned for more details!

THE question

Gimme a P! P!
Gimme an O! O!
Gimme a T! T!
Gimme an A! A!
Gimme a T! T!
Gimme an O! O!
What does that spell?
POTATO!!! Woooooh!!

Well that was exciting. How are you our fellow potatoes and humans or whatever you may be? We are doing great.

Today as a was sitting on my bed, staring at my wall, a question came to me and made me think. This question was:
If a potato's skin is peeped, does that mean it's naked?

The answer to that question is no. Think about it. If you shave off the skin you get the inside of the potato. It's kind of like if humans (we aren't fully human so this doesn't really apply to us) were to skin themselves they would get their insides showing. Potatoes enjoy walking around with no clothes. Don't worry we prefer to wear clothes!

Please don't feel awkward around potatoes now that you know this. Keep treating them the same as you did before. Hopefully this didn't make it too awkward for you.

Achoo!

Don't you just hate it when you get sick? Why am I even asking you this? Of course you do! It's one of the worst feelings in the world! Having to do nothing but rest and eat all the same foods that are apparently supposed to help cure you is just tiresome! But, if you think about it, being sick with the flu or having a sore throat as a human is a whole lot better than being a sick potato. 

Why? Well, about 99% of the time potatoes get sick they end up rotting (a form of potato death). Bugs and worms, and events like droughts, floods,  and human beings who like to play "hot potato" are very common reasons for the death of a potato. A rare reason for potato death is because other vegetables sabotaged their growth when they were still a little, helpless baby. Even carrots wouldn't take it that far! But, when potatoes are affected by these, you can usually tell that the potato is just on the first stage of death when the potato is softer and mushier than usual. After a couple of days the potato will worsen and turn different colours, first green, then brown, then finally, black. Once the potato is black you know that it is no good to eat and will soon decompose (but even at this time the potato is useful because it can be used as a great fertilizer). But of course, many potatoes do survive these happenings because we potatoes are strong fighters! There are also some potatoes who survive because of special chemicals that humans use on them, but this is quite rare for most humans just let them die off. As you can see, it's a good thing we're half humans-half potatoes because we experience the same effects of bacterias and viruses like human beings!

 Until next time! Take care of yourselves so that you wont be ill! 

Start the superman theme song

Guys, we can't keep this a secret from you anymore. What we are about to tell you is huge. Brace yourselves. Okay ready? *deep breathe* Potatoes are really superheroes. *Plugs ears* You may scream now. Oh you're not going to. Okay. *removes hands* We will tell you the whole story too.
So a long time ago, when the first potato was born, around the dinosaur age. It lived happily and peacefully. One day a meteor hit the Earth! The radiation from that flaming rock hit the potato, changing it's DNA. Now the potato has powers. Here's just a few...
THE POWER TO CHANGE:
You can cut, mash, skin, boil, etc and the potato will adapt to these factors. You can't kill them so they help you.
THE POWER TO FIGHT HUNGER:
This is probably their best power. This power comes in 2 steps. First the potato will change and once it enters your stomach it changes back into a whole potato, with a cape and everything. It fights off its villain HUNGRY HIPPO and makes you feel full. Pretty cool if you ask me.
POWER OF CAMOUFLAGE:
When it comes to hiding from evil and enforcing surprise attacks, potatoes are the most skilled. They easily blend in with their surroundings and always succeed with their attacks. Their brown colour helps hide them in the dirt, boxes and dark places. (There might be a potato watching you now and you wouldn't know).
THE POWER OF ELECTRICITY:
If you ever have no power, don't get scared just use a potato. If you stick the plug into a potato it will provide power to whatever device you are using. This is the potatoes weakest power because when they over use this power they end up cooking themselves and go through a forced change which they can't undo.
POTATOES HAVE SUPER STRENGTH:
Trapped in a room? No problem. A potato will help you. Take the potato and either:
A) Throw it at a window and the window will burst
B) Throw it at your captors. They will fall unconscious.
C) Throw it at the door/wall the break them so you can escape.
However before throwing make sure the potato is fully rested and fed. They don't work well when tired and hungry. Also they won't work well under pressure. So be careful.
Those are some of the many powers of a potato. I suggest you be careful. Potatoes are very sneaky and they could be pulling an Edward Cullen and watching you sleep. (In case you don't know what pulling an Edward Cullen is, it's when you are a sparkly being and you creep into people's houses and watch them sleep. Potatoes do this but they don't sparkle unless they apply the body mist.)
We are sorry we couldn't keep our mouths shut. We tried, we really did. But we couldn't keep it in any longer. Don't treat the potatoes any differently or else they'll know we told you. We weren't suppose to tell anyone. If you get in trouble with the potatoes we are so sorry.